Random domain of Jun's

you don't know what i am thinking
you don't know what i am feeling
you don't know why i am suffering
you don't know why i am crying
you don't know what i am sacrificing
you don't know what i am covering

i cried every night for you
i thought every night of you
i felt every time for you
i suffered every time for you
i sacrificed everything for you
i covered everything for you

did you even know?

You don't know anything...

i don't feel safe when you were with her
i don't feel safe when you say those words
i don't feel secured when you don't understand
i don't feel relieved when you didn't ask

what i feel and why im sad

i feel pain...

i'm afraid that i am not perfect
i'm afraid that i can't change you
i'm afraid that i can't please you
i'm afraid that i can't hold you
i'm afraid that i'm just a tool
i'm afraid that i'm cant be the one
i'm afraid that i'm not the one
i'm afraid that i cant make you happy
i'm afraid that i cant be there for you
as much as she could

I'm not pretty
I'm not beautiful
I'm not smart
I'm not intelligent
I'm not ample
I'm not capable
I'm not presentable
I'm not what i want to be
I'm not what you want me to be
I'm not like her

I'm not perfect...

I'm not worth it...
I'm not worth of anything
I'm not worth it for your concerns

What can i do for myself?

I can only pray
day by day

that

i can be perfect each day
i can avoid making mistakes
i can see you
i can be strong
i can be worth of something
i can be the one
i can be something else
i can be someone else
i can make you happy
i can give you joy
i can change you
i can be there for you
i can be the one
i can fill you
i can make you realize

that this is different

i wish that i could make you realize

why

and

how

much i care for you

how much that i could swore myself

to my death bed...


that








i could be perfect

at least



for one day...